Sunday, June 7, 2009

...

I don't know what to do. I can't sleep. I feel so useless. So lost. So confused.

We had plans.

I talked with him today.

I can't stop crying. Can't stop thinking. Can't figure out why this is happening after we got so close.

How do I explain this to our daughter? How do I press on through this?

The language barrier is so frustrating. I need an explanation. Need to know what the hell happened, although I'm quite sure I don't want to know.

All these dreams... all these plans... everything went *poof* and my vision of our future is impossible. No more time together... no more hugs and kisses... no more laughter... no more children together... no growing old with him.

It just doesn't make sense... and I'm so tired.

9 comments:

Steve Cotton said...

I am so sorry. I wish there was something we bloggers could do.

Jane said...

OMG. That is horrible. My heart just dropped when I read your post. In the world of blogging, it relies so much on words and yet there are no words to comfort at this tragic time. I hope you have friends and family to hug you and help you through this period. I am thinking of you and yours.

deena said...

Be strong and if you need someone to hug your daughter is with you. Hug her as many times you want, it helps, may God be with you.

Cindy in California said...

I am so very sorry. You, your daughter and the family of your husband will be in my prayers.

Grimfairy said...

OMG OMG OMG. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. If you need any translation of any sort, I'd be happy to help you out. You can email me at manaclean@gmail.com

I'm bilingual so I can lend a hand if you need it.

Chrissy y Keith said...

Our Prayers are with you and your family.

mydearlizzy said...

Oh my gosh, aighmeigh, I have been off-line and had no idea. I am so sorry. I wish there was something I could do.

I am shocked and heartbroken for you and your daughter.

aighmeigh said...

Hello everyone--thank you so much for your support, prayers, and sentiments. I appreciate them so much and feel so fortunate to have people all over the world sending good feelings our way. I will never forget the kindness you've all shown me. :)

Laurie said...

My heart and my prayers are with you. I have not been reading blogs lately. Wow. God will be with you dear, even when it seems impossible. Later when you are better, try reading a bit of Elisabeth Elliot whose husband was killed by tribesmen in Ecaudor many years ago. Her website is Elisabethelliot.org.