Thursday, January 15, 2009

Timing... or a lack thereof.

Just a bit over a week ago, if you were to have asked me if I'd be staying in El Salvador I wouldn't have been too sure... mostly because I didn't think I could hang. Over the past week, I've gotten into a good groove though. Mi Amor has been spending a bit more time at home (although still not much), we've had time to joke and laugh, I've taken a serious interest in our business and am helping out, and I've gotten to like the domestic tasks I've taken on throughout the day. I've been keeping myself busy with La Hija and the housework and I've grown quite content here.

Of course, in the irony of all ironies, this happens just at a point when we realize that we are really struggling financially. In the past month or so, a lot has happened with respect to our business and, although it makes enough to feed one mouth and pay the bills, it does not make enough to feed three. I have no objection to working... in fact, I want to work, but that requires relocation and relocation is just not in the cards for us right now. I have some money in savings, but that needs to go toward my bills that don't go away just because I leave the US.

So, after many long, teary and heart wrenching conversations, Mi Amor and I have made the hardest of hard decisions: La Hija and I will be temporarily returning to the US at the end of the month. We are hoping it will only have to be for a few months... just until he can get the business back on track and get things solidified again.

Thank God we have an understanding, supportive family because returning to the states is going to be much harder than it was leaving.

I have more to write, and some pictures too, but that will have to wait until I'm feeling a little less frustrated, disappointed and sad.


chicadedios25 said...

Oh dear,

Everything will work out like it is supposed to somehow.

I am sorry things have not worked out like you all planned.

Times are tough right now everywhere even in the states...that has to trickle down to other countries as well.

Good luck in whatever your decision may be.

Steve Cotton said...

A sad decision, but most likely a wise one -- the wisdom being in the reunion, the sadness in the moment. You have my prayers.

Kristen said...

I am sorry mon cheri. Will you be staying with the mother?

Travel safe and be well!

Lizzy said...

Wow, I'm sorry to hear that things are not what they should be. I wish you the best!

Let us know what you plan to do on your return to the States.

Kadmiel said...

Im sorry to here that :( you just arrived.. have you thought about doing a teaching positon i know they are always looking for native english speakers which may help with the finaces. or maybe even an online business ? just some ideas i hope you take care of things well and good luck and keep us posted.

aighmeigh said...

Chica, it will definitely work out, and this is for the best (even though it feels downright horrible). We are hashing out a definite plan and are going to make the separation as short as possible.

Steve, definitely sad... but necessary for the health of our relationship, out mutual sanity and our future financial situation.

Kris, those details are kind of up in the air right now. There are multiple options... I guess it just boils down to which one is closest to where I end up working.

Lizzy, this is just a sort of hiccup in our plans. There will still be a Vida Salvadoreña to write about, and I'll definitely keep going. It's all part of the journey, right? :)

Kadmiel, I am planning on teaching... the problem is, I've been offered positions in Santa Ana and San Salvador, and we are living 45 mins to an hour from either of those places. Even with the decent pay (in Salvadoran terms) I've been offered, it would cost more to commute than I would make. I'd love to do an online business and had hopes of teaching online, but it wasn't in the cards this semester. Something will happen to help us make this work... it's just hard to remember that life doesn't necessarily happen on the schedule we planned. We have faith that it'll smooth out in a few months.

Live Simply Love Strongly said...

I'm glad to hear that your attiude is so positve about this change, though I'm sure it's quite a disappointment...Dang! Wishing the best for you and your family.

aighmeigh said...

LS, thank you :) It certainly took a while for me to look at this positively, but I've now realized there's no reason for me not to. It's all a learning experience, and we've gone this far... no point in not continuing to push on--especially since it'll just be a brief hiccup in our plans :)

Honduras Sprout said...

Wow. That is a big hiccup. My husband and I often have weeks and months like this. Somehow we make it through, but I may be spending sometime back in the states for two reasons. 1, I need to work to earn money to pay for the airfare back and 2, My husband needs a break from having to support the entire family so he can focus on just the business and build it back up after the slow winter months.

Maybe things will change for you guys before you leave...

aighmeigh said...

Mama Sprout, that sounds like the reason we're back... he needs some time to focus on the business and get back on track financially. I'll be here as long as it takes for him to do that and for me to earn the money to return. Ah, the fun of living with our feet in two countries!!